Blogger's Code of Conduct

A few weeks ago, I read this article from Boing Boing on Blogger "code of conduct" trades freedom for politeness. It impressed my that Tim O'Reilly's proposed code of conduct was well meaning in response to Kathy Sierra's situation, but a little overbearing and just too hard to swallow for most folks. The badge is admittedly hokey, but heck, I'm a mom, and that's the rule in my house. Those people who don't want to follow what is mostly common courtesy, should have their moms come and smack them upside the head. I do delete comments especially if they have no bearing on the post, but thankfully have not had to deal with negative or hurtful feedback. These comments range from generic spam to all out rants about who knows what (I stop reading as soon as I see words like Anti-Christ, kill, copulating, etc.)

This story on NPR included an interview with Kathy Sierra, which prompted me to finally post on this topic. There is definitely an issue where people hide behind their anonymity on the internet and feel free to slander others. This happen to a friend of mine on a forum. The comments made about her were totally denigrating and I was shocked. She chose to ignore it (Tim's Rule #6), not empowering those weasels who wrote the comments (I would have gone home and cried). At work, I was involved in a "talent review" session involving my direct report and was surprised what other people said about him behind closed doors. It's not that I never say anything bad about people, but I would prefer to focus on the positive aspects of people. There is a time and place for constructive criticism, but only if it is constructive, and not meant to simply tear someone apart.

I'm glad Web 2.0 is all about bringing people together, but there will always be mean and clueless people. There is no way to make them behave, but it must be made clear that it will not be tolerated.

4/25/07 Update - I do remember this post on 20-way seats where I didn't delete a comment because it was relevant. See, I'm not just a happy-go-lucky everything-is-peachy blogger!

Victim of Daylight Saving Time

Since I previously posted on DST, this article describes a victim of this change: Time stands still for Hempfield teen in lockup - Tribune-Review. Poor kid called at the wrong time and the school failed to update their clocks until Monday, so he got bagged for someone else's bomb threat. Granted, it was an iffy move to call at 3am out of boredom, but 12 days in juvenile detention? No way I would call that not overstepping his rights. No wonder he is now home schooled.

Things to bring and do next time at Disney

OK, this is the last you'll hear of our trip to Disney! I've been slow in getting all these drafts done...

We only stayed for three full days which was a good amount of time especially for Dova being only 2. Let's just say we knew she had enough when she had a full blown meltdown (kicking and screaming on the floor) in front of security at Orlando Int'l Airport. Here are some of the things we should bring and do for next time:

• The weather was great in early December, but it was a bit cool in the mornings, evenings and for the pool, so next time we will come back in early November for Adam's birthday.
• A Sharpie for marking water bottles. In the Coca-cola monopolized environment, nothing but a Sharpie can write on those completely plastic blue Dasani bottles. Luckily in my trade shows, I picked up some cute Sharpies Minis just for this purpose!
  
• Meal Plan - We didn't opt for the meal plan on this trip because the kids were still little and don't always eat full meals. Dova still barely ate any breakfast, but Adam was all gungho with the Mickey Waffles for breakfast. They alternated chicken fingers and pizza for all the rest of the meals, saving a few leftovers here and there. In the end, I still think it would've been cheaper with the meal plan because they really rip you off a la carte.


• More Fiber - We brought Fiber Choice for the kids to have every day and even with the occasional carrot sticks and grapes for Dova (Adam had none whatsoever), she failed to make a number 2 until the night before we left. That was 4 days from her last one! There is a lack of high fiber foods at Disney World that the kids will actually eat. BTW, who would think Amazon would sell it?
  


• More sweatshirts - We packed one each for Adam and Dova, but we really needed them almost every day in the mornings and evenings. After the first spill of chocolate milk on them, they are stained for the rest of the trip.


• Screwdriver (or swiss army knife in checked in luggage of course) for opening packages. We got Adam a remote control Corvette, but he could only look at it screwed into the package.


• Hotels off the Epcot International Gateway. Instead of waiting for several busloads of people with extremely tired kids, I watched in envy as people simply walked out of Epcot into their hotels. I don't know how far these accomodations actually are, but I will definitely check them out for next time.

Usdan flashback

I received this flyer from Usdan which showed this vintage photo of one of the piano studios. I attended the Usdan Center for the Performing Arts (an artsy fartsy summer camp) in the summers when I was 8 to 12 years old (1975-1979), a bit after this photo was taken, but it still took me right back. These studios were beautiful hexagonal wooden structures shaped like teepees, with skylights and an open wall structure. The roof came down and overhung the wall at about 3 feet above the floor. There was also a small space between the short walls and the floor. You could lean against the wall and look out at the ground below and you could also hop down between the floor and the wall and escape to the outside (back then I was not so squeamish about spider webs). The first year I was there, the pianos were arranged against the far walls as shown in the picture, but in subsequent years, the pianos were arranged facing forward around the room, so you could hide behind the taller uprights in the back. I always took the back right corner. This also afforded the opportunity to "escape" in the middle of class much to our teacher's frustration. The one teacher I remember distinctly was the pianist Adolovni Acosta.

She is a small feisty Filipino woman with long hair, heavy makeup and quite the temper. She wore beautiful long flowing dresses. She was also full of fun, and despite complaining about us badly behaved kids, she loved teaching us in this beautiful environment. I have to admit, I was probably one of the biggest troublemakers in the class, but also one of the better pianists. Basically the story of my childhood as a "talented troublemaker". I did a search of her on the internet and found that she is still performing today. I also found a quote which was typical of her personality, "Is it possible to remove my name from the web? Thank you. Adolovni Acosta." I guess it didn't occur to her that simply asking the question permanently put her on the web.

Traveling with contact lenses

In January, I switched to PureVision disposable lenses to provide more oxygen for my eyes. I had been wearing CSI lenses for 20 years which I absolutely loved because they were so comfortable, so clear and lasted forever (usually 2-3 years). But since I started working in the office five days a week and wearing contacts those five days, there was definitley a noticeable change in the capillaries encroaching on my corneas. Previously, I would wear glasses on the days I worked at home and on the weekends to allow the oxygen to reach my eyes. So for the sake of my eyes' health, I switched to the less comfortable PureVision 30 day lenses on my doctor's advice. I asked what made these new lenses go "bad" after 30 days and my doctor replied lipid deposits. She also mentioned that they didn't require daily cleaning although they did benefit from rubbing. I soon learned what that was all about. At the end of January, a week before my 30 days was up, I had to go to a trade show in California. I stayed at the Hilton, which only has fancy moisturizing soaps. I noticed that my lenses started to look "streaky", like your windshield after putting your car through the car wash with the wax option in the old days (those waxes have gotten much better now). I kept washing my hands and trying to rub them clean, but it just got worse and worse, so much so that I had to resort to wearing my glasses since I didn't have a spare pair of contacts. I especially needed to see well for David Copperfield; what good are illusions when you can't see them? I finally figured out that the problem was in the soap from the Hilton and my obsessive hand washing before handling the lenses.

A month later, I had to go to another trade show and stayed at another Hilton (which had exactly the same soap). So in preparation, I planned out my strategy. I wanted to carry on my bags where I previously checked them in. The presented another issue with the TSA 3-1-1 rule, 3 oz. or smaller container, 1 quart size bag, and 1 bag per traveler. All contacts solutions come in 4 oz. or larger bottles. They need to change this! You can't really transfer contacts solution to any old travel bottle because it has to stay sterile. To get around this, I filled up two cases full of solution, one for each night I was there. I only have two cases, so this would be a problem for a three night stay. Soap was another matter. I didn't want to bring any hard soap as I felt they all had too many lipids, as hard soap is fat-based to begin with. I wanted to bring a liquid soap, but again, they don't sell any in a 3 oz. or less size and I didn't have any extra travel bottles. I ended up buying a 2 oz. sanitizer bottle and emptied it out into another existing sanitizer bottle (we have them all over the house - big surprise). I filled it up with my liquid soap, thinking that the extra sanitizer left in it would only help with my hand washing before handling my lenses. Unfortunately, the leftover sanitizer "liquefied" the soap, but it stilled washed well. In fact, the alcohol probably deactivated any of the existing moisturizers in the soap. I just hoped that the TSA agent wouldn't suspect this strange non-viscous liquid in the sanitizer container. They did check out my quart bag of liquids, but mostly pondered the extra set of contacts that I had to stick in there (stored in liquid as well). I definitely went overboard planning for the care of my contacts for this trip but it worked out perfectly. I got a good month and a half life out of that pair. I count all the days that I wore or didn't wear contacts and stretched it until they just got too uncomfortable, no streaking this time. Now, I never rub them and handle them as little as possible. See, all this obsessive behavior is worth it!

Keeping my Chiropractic addiction at bay

When I was young, my parents always told me that Chiropractors where just quacks, and not real doctors. I didn't know much about it, so when my work offered a seminar on it as part of their wellness program a year ago, I was curious to learn about it. I was fascinated by their success stories especially of children and babies, as children are not so influenced by psychosomatic therapies. They brought a bunch of contraptions: a double scale to see your side to side weight distribution, a string alignment grid to chart your posture and a temperature measuring device to detect nervous activity imbalances in your neck. All these hard core measurements appealed to my engineering side. They were very persuasive and "scientific" about their use of these instruments, so I signed up for a free diagnosis and consultation for Doug and myself. I don't actually have any issues, some mild neck and back pain, and some numbness in my fingers if my arms are bent for long periods (knitting or driving a car) which I usually attribute to poor circulation.

During our consultation, Doug and I first got to watch a video about how great chiropractic was. During the evaluation, the doctor kept pushing the free x-ray which we both declined. They started doing the hard sell, "we won't be able to fully diagnose the extent of your subluxations." We really had to be firm to refuse them. During the rest of the evaluation, I could see that my charts showed that my results were extremely bad, where Doug's looked pretty much OK. Which makes no sense since Doug has many back problems where I have none in comparison. I started doubting these so called scientific measurements. We also saw brochures touting chiropractic as a cure for all sorts of ailments including asthma, constipation, immunity to colds as well as the usual back pains. After all, everything is controlled by your nervous system and if the nerves are getting frayed by misalignments in the spine, that is obviously the root of all problems. They also pushed their educational classes and seminars on chiropractic. I started to think that this was looking more like a cult, where they brainwash you with all this persuasive material and suck your money away in "treatments".

I had to return for my results the next week and Doug never went back (I guess he already knew better!). The doctor recommended that I have treatments 3 times a week for 6 weeks, then 2 times a week for 6 to 12 weeks, and then 1 time a week for another 6 to 12 weeks. For what? Mild back pain and occasional numbness in my fingers? Hardly seemed necessary since I had managed to live 39 years without treatment. My first adjustment however, was definitely enlightening. My neck was suddenly so loose, I felt like a bobblehead. Could it be that all these years I really had an abnormally stiff neck? It really felt good! I went back a couple more times and then stopped because I had changed insurance plans and it was no longer a $15 copay per visit, but the full $45 or $55 with the new high deductible plan. What a racket! Two minutes of cracking: crack crack crack, $45 please. No wonder they need to brainwash you to keep coming back. How many adjustments can they push through in an hour? What a great money making machine. The other fluff stuff they do with ultrasonic treatments, back rollers, etc. is probably not much more beneficial than a massage chair, but perhaps people feel better about forking over the money when they spend more than the 2 minutes needed for the adjustment.

The feeling of having my neck cracked reminded me of when I used to obsessively crack my knuckles as a kid. I kept wanting to crack them even though I heard that it would lead to arthritis later in life. I finally quit cracking them obsessively (but the urge returns especially if I'm sick), but I definitely ended up with larger than normal knuckles. I can't imagine that cracking your neck on a regular basis won't do the same kind of damage to those bones and ligaments. But I can see getting hooked on the feeling just like cracking knuckles. When I started suspecting that chiropractic was a bit of a cult, I found this interesting website, Chirobase: Your Skeptical Guide to Chiropractic History, Theories, and Practices, about the myths and truths (albeit probably biased) about chiropractic.

My personal experience after my first few adjustments was that I became hooked on the bobblehead feeling. I would dream about going again looking for my fix and trying to avoid x-rays. However, I just couldn't bring myself to pay for more adjustments. About six months later, I had the urge to go back again, but I needed a re-evaluation. Again, without x-rays, my results were even worse than before, but in actuality, I had no complaints except for an occasional stiff neck. My numbness has seemed to subside as well. I had a different doctor perform the adjustment, and he had a gentler touch and technique which I completely fell in love with, and left me wanting more. I went back one more time and then resisted the urge to return. There is a co-worker that uses another practice which only charges $20 per adjustment that I may check out in the future if I ever get the overwhelming urge. But oh this doctor, his hands are simply amazing! Can you tell I have the addiction bad? No need for brainwashing for me. Even writing this post is making me crave it!

Bigger isn't better for the Wii

Here is our newest 27" TV which we bought in 1998 when we finally sprang for cable and realized that the old TV wasn't even cable ready. I finally broke 200 and beat Adam in bowling, but Dova had insisted that I play as Ariel (The Little Mermaid), so this score doesn't count for me!

When I got the Wii, I was afraid that I would also get the new TV bug. The snowball effect happened after I got new counters for the kitchen. The 25 year old stove had to go and we needed a bigger fridge with the kids, and then we finally replaced the 25 year old vinyl floor. When we started playing two player tennis and boxing on the Wii, the vertical split screen was just barely wide enough to see both sides. When the screen is split horizontally, a widescreen format would make it look worse, but a bigger screen in general would be nice. I brought the Wii over to a friend's house with a 50" HD widescreen flatscreen TV. Of course, it looked beautiful, but then I found out that the games became too hard to play!!

When we tried playing Rayman Raving Rabbits, I couldn't do the disco dancing at all, where I usually ace it at home. I tried turning up the sound which helps at home, but I could only score about 150 of the 750 points to win. And when we finally got to shoot the rabbits, we just barely scraped by with one life to spare. Seeing all those rabbits coming at you from all ends of the huge screen is too hard to handle! After bringing the Wii home, I easily won the exact same disco game with 1000 points. So luckily for me, playing the Wii on my regular 27" CRT is actually easier, so no new TV for me!

We finished Rayman just yesterday and loved it!! Total silliness.


Today we finished the Gamecube game Simpsons Hit and Run. Nothing like crashing cars in Springfield for some fun laughs.


I'm glad that there are finally some used Wii games to buy now, as forking over $50 each for Rayman and Warioware was totally insane!

Wordless Wednesday - Ebony plays Clue Jr.

Knitted bracelet

This is my second attempt at using that wavy exponential knitting and again I tried to do it in the round. Started as 24 stitches on dpns, and then it got big enough to put on a circular needle (see Doug). This time I crocheted the fun fur on while it was on the circular needle which was much easier. Did 3 rows of increases and cast off purl wise, which stopped it from curling in on itself, but made the edge too thick. It was still way to hard to knit in the round and the initial stitches got stretched WAAAY out (bracelet was meant for one hand not two!). Next time, I will knit it straight and join later if I want something round.

Mother and Daughter Insomnia

I blame myself completely for Dova's sleep habits. When Adam was a toddler, we were very strict about creating good sleep habits. By the time he got his big boy bed, we started leaving him in his room while he was still awake so that he could learn to fall asleep on his own. Sometimes Doug would be too tired to get out of his bed after storytime and end up falling asleep with him. We would have all sorts of fights about how this was not good for Adam's sleep independence, etc. By the time I was pregnant with Dova, I was simply too tired to argue anymore, but then started developing my own insomnia patterns. I figured it was just pregnancy insomnia. I would wake up in the middle of the night and not be able to get back to sleep for hours. Most of the time, it would be just daily lists of things to do going through my mind. Often, I would get out of bed and either get a snack (I was pregnant and allowed right?) or get on the computer. I've since learned that these are totally no no's when it comes to middle of the night insomnia! Still the urge to "get something done" is hard to overcome.

After Dova was born, we definitely suffered from second child syndrome, where she had every thing easier including sleeping. When I had nursed Adam in the middle of the night, I propped myself up uncomfortably in a wingback chair with my head bobbing and then carefully put him back in his crib afterwards. Dova's room also has a guest bed, so for her, I popped her in that bed with me to nurse. It was much more comfortable for me and often times I would simply fall asleep with her in the bed. Better sleep for mom and baby right? When she eventually moved into the bed, the same pattern continued. Every night, I would lie in her bed until she fell asleep, often falling asleep myself (so much for all those arguments with Doug, definitely the pot calling the kettle black!). If I left, she would often wake up in the middle of the night and walk right up to my bedside, and I would have to bring her back to her room. And only mom would do, no substitutes! Sometimes if I had the fight, I would force her to stay in bed by herself and go back to sleep. More times than not, I would simply climb in bed with her. It was just easier, less aggravation for me and her. Nowadays, this happens about once a week, but at one point not so long ago it happened every night for two months straight!

If I fell asleep with her in the beginning of the night, and woke up several hours later, I would be at risk for mid night insomnia. I would try to keep myself semi-asleep while I brushed my teeth by saying "Don't think of anything, keep you eyes closed, don't think of anything". If insomnia struck, I would toss and turn in bed for hours. And as if on cue, Dova would often wander down and I would gladly take the opportunity to go snuggle with her instead of suffering insomnia. I'd go to her bed, and we'd snuggle, looking at each other, stroking each other's faces. It is our little mid night insomnia secret. It is always easy to fall asleep with Dova because I can grab her and squeeze her and hold her tight. If I dare disturb Doug while he is sleeping, the grump monster comes out. It could be that worrying about waking Doug adds to the insomnia.

Actual sleeping is another story. Dova is not a easy sleep partner. She likes to make sure that you are there by sending her foot towards you and pressing into your back, leg, stomach or butt. If the foot comes at you quickly, it feels like a swift kick. Sometimes it comes slowly and she will hook her foot into the back of your underwear and press her foot into your butt. The reason I can remember this so vividly is because I spent several hours last night having feverish insomnia, with Dova doing just that and me composing this post in my head (note to self: don't blog while having a fever, get blog insomnia and funny blog dreams all night. Wait, I still have a fever right now, AARRGGHHHH!!). Alas, I could not grab her and squeeze her because I was too sick.

So now Dova is completely dependent on me for falling asleep and staying asleep. If I'm not around, dad will do and sometimes grandma, but don't try that too many nights in a row (just ask Grandma Marjorie). And of course Adam has been sleeping happily by himself through the night for years. Lesson definitely not learned here!

Not all Disney wands are equal

At Mickey's Very Merry Christmas Party, we saw these cool lighted Mickey wands which were only $5 each. Wow, I thought, the Star Wars light sabers (with actual lights, not all of them have that) are $13, what a deal for these! So I bought two for the kids. The next night at Epcot, the kids kept asking for more light wands. We held off until we were leaving the park and finally found vendor cart that was still open. I had been eying the different wands all night and convinced Adam to pick this cool strobe wand. It is a basically a strobe light in a soft rubber ball on a flexible wand, so when you swing it around, it makes cool multi-colored light trails. I was thrilled when he took my suggestion (hmm, did I want it for him or myself?). Dova picked her own Tinkerbell magic wand which also had multi-colored effects. I fished out a $20 bill, handed it to the vendor and he replied that it was $30. What?!? They were $15 each. I had just assumed these wands would also be reasonably priced. Now it was too late to back out as the kids already had them in hand, so I forked over the money. I guess not all Disney wands are created equal. The kids still love and use their expensive wands and the Mickey wands are untouched in the toy box.

Funny moments with my Mom at Lab Automation

My mom joined my on my work trip to the Lab Automation trade show. Although she was sick during the trip, there were some funny moments that we enjoyed:

• Poolside Party - The evening that she arrived, I went out to eat with my co-workers and they were all worried about whether she would be OK on her own. Turned out that she went to the show's opening night poolside party and ate a bunch of hors d'oeuvre for dinner. She then became known as the woman who can take care of herself.
• "It's OK, she's a Professor" - I arrived early with her to set up one morning, and technically only exhibitors are allowed before hours. The guard stopped her and an organizer looked at her badge and let her enter because she was a professor. Not sure if it was a position of privilege or just that she wouldn't have been a spy for a competitor. Still we were "honored" that she got special treatment.
• Where are the sequins? - While we were there, it just so happened that David Copperfield was playing nearby for 2 nights so we got some nosebleed tickets to see him at nearly $70 a ticket. The show was a bit of a disappointment, he was basically coasting, filling a lot of time with videos about how great he was, and barely breaking a sweat. Plus she didn't think he was dressed properly in his unbuttoned blue shirt, t-shirt and black pants (his now signature look I'm sure). Afterwards, in the lobby, even before we left in the theater, she was complaining about how terrible the show was. "If I'm going to pay $70 to see him, I expect a tuxedo and sequins!! Not dressed so sloppy!!" Tom, Noorul and I could barely hold in the chuckles. She was right of course, but not so loud right in the theater!

Stop Cyberbullying Day, March 30th 2007

I know I'm a few days late for this, but I've been sick in bed the last few days (and hadn't even touched the computer till after 5pm today!). I was outraged by the events that happened to Kathy Sierra, especially since it also implicated a Flickr friend, Lasadh. In honor of Lasadh's (aka Sherri Jackson) wishes I attempted a series of stop cyberbullying pictures, where I resorted to using the kid's underwear (side note - Dova is potty trained, woo hoo!).

In a note of irony, I experienced my first internet stalking on the very same day. I got a comment on this photo, saying "nice flowers & beautiful legs". Hmm, that's a strange comment. I clicked on the Flickr commenter and was shocked to find a page full of MY pictures of Adam in bathing suits and shorts. There were other semi-clothed boys as well. This was totally shocking and sickening to me especially since one of my favorite pictures below was included with the title "chinnesse".

I call this "Having too much fun during a timeout". It was taken after the kids had a whooping, hollering, crazy, good time ripping off all their clothes and needed a timeout to settle down. They were still having great time, as Adam continued to crack Dova up. Sure they are in their underwear and diaper, but this is no pr0n. After seeing these pictures on this sicko's site, I proceeded to file a copyright infringement with Yahoo (owners of Flickr). I also went and deleted any pictures of the kids taking baths or in their underwear (except for this one). Today I heard back from Yahoo that the infringing material was no longer there, so the guy was probably forced down by another user. He either wanted to be caught by leaving comments, or was just incredibly stupid. I'm glad he is gone, but I'll definitely be more careful of the pictures I put up on Flickr.